0 1 1

☆彡 Bucket List: Part One

  • Own a motorcycle (and ride it daily)
  • Watch the entire Sailor Moon series from beginning to end in one sitting
  • Have $5,000 in my savings account
  • Finish a sketchbook
  • Meet the Dalai Lama
  • Meet Nobuo Uematsu
  • Travel to Canada
  • More cats
  • Not live in Georgia anymore (fuck I hate this place)
  • Learn Japanese or Esperanto
  • Attend E3 or Comic-Con at some point in my life
  • Go to bed before midnight every night (yeah right…)
  • Road trip to Seattle
  • Get a black belt in some form of martial arts
  • Buy a house
  • Get paid to draw
  • Finish a Pathfinder or D&D campaign
  • Write a book

☆彡 I promised not to speak lowly of myself or say untrue things to make others feel better. The way I see it, any person that expects me to bash myself so they can feel better is not a good person to be around. A good person to be around would support me. So…no thanks. Exchanging my confidence for a person I don’t really care about is a terrible trade.

☆彡 It is already April, yet Mark and I haven’t started a ‘The Matrix’ or ‘The Lord of the Rings’ marathon yet. I don’t know. I guess I’m more focused on The Legend of Korra, Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, and a bunch of other shows I am missing because I lack cable. No excuses, right? I just need to lurk moar.

☆彡 Metric. Black Sheep. Help, I’m Alive. That is all.

☆彡 Finished Catching Fire today. I can’t believe the book just ended right there. *falls in a slow circle and dies* Oh well. I’m going to visit the library tomorrow and cross my fingers for a copy of Mockingjay.

☆彡 My sleep schedule is so stupid right now. I’d do just about anything to get to bed and wake up at decent hours. -.-

☆彡 I like speaking to people who succeed at losing a lot of weight (50 pounds or more) because they’re real. They’re not celebrities who secretly hire trainers or hire chefs to cook for them. They’re everyday men and women on limited budgets and time. I’ve picked up a lot of tips over the years, but in the end it really comes down to motivation…or, in my case, finding out why I am so intimidated by weight loss. I guess I already know the answer. I just don’t know how to face it properly. Long story short, I dealt with a lot of stalking, sexual harassment, and unpleasant things like that when I was thin. I didn’t intentionally put on weight to protect myself from that, but I did find that food was comforting and that being fat stopped a lot of harassment I faced. But, as someone told me, food is not my friend. It is not therapy. It is not filling any voids I have. It is just fuel. And she is extremely right. Eating junk is not going to make me happy in the end. I just have to take advantage of the thick skin I obtained over the years, and do what I have to do against people like that. I can keep practicing karate, and not only use that to get fit, but to also protect myself. I am not trying to come out of this as thin as I used to be. Being skinny is not a priority to me. More than anything, I want to be strong. That is why I am so obsessed with weight lifting, I guess. If I can train myself to bench press 150+ lbs. then I can probably grab someone by the neck and toss them aside. That’s more of an inspiration to me than bikinis and skinny jeans. I guess that’s weird, but what else is new, right? ^u^

☆彡 All of the unexpected bills Mark and I have been dealing with lately have been both a blessing and a curse. A curse because having more bills than money is never a good thing. But it’s a blessing because it forces us to lead a more humble life. The truth is that Mark and I do not enjoy indulgence. We’re always talking about moving to an isolated village, growing our own food, and living off our land. That’s the type of thing we consider paradise. But we fall into the same trap that a lot of people fall into. The I-need-it-now-or-never trap. It really makes us spoiled. Sometimes I think back to how we used to be when we were first going out, and what little we had between each other, and it makes me realize how much we’ve changed. I don’t want to become a slave to money, trinkets, and first-world luxuries, you know? Even if I win the lottery, I want to pursue that life we dream about where I work hard for the things I have.

☆彡 Spectrum Nexus had a prank for April Fools’ Day. They released a Berserk manga update, but when you go to read the manga the image won’t load. It’s just blurry and it says: “Loading error. Please try again later.” Of course, my first instinct on April Fools’ Day is to trust no one and nothing. So, I already went into the Berserk manga thinking: “Let’s see how this turns out,” but a lot of people were FURIOUS about it. The site owner even had to apologize for it. This only reaffirms what I already know: Do not fuck with Berserk fans. They are not playing around. If you say you have something Berserk related and you’re lying about it…prepare yourself. LOL. Seriously, I can imagine ‘Sign’ playing in the background the moment someone lies about a Berserk update. Then I can imagine the furious Berserk fan pulling out Guts’ sword out of nowhere and cleaving people in half. Yep. That may actually happen someday. Once more, do not fuck with Berserk fans. XD

☆彡 Going through Dark Souls withdrawal. *weeps phantom tears* Why do I love you, Dark Souls, when you’re such a dick? ;-;

☆彡 For some reason, my eyebrows are growing very thick after I shaped them up last time. I was going to shape them up again, but I realized that I am better off with thick eyebrows. Neat eyebrows are great for people who are very meticulous about how they dress…but I’m fairly tomboyish. I don’t think a tomboy with neat eyebrows is a great combination. At least not for me. LOL. Besides, I’ve been introduced to the whole ‘ulzzang’ culture and most of those girls do nothing to their eyebrows. And they still look incredibly pretty! Here’s an example:

Of course, I’ll have to pluck stray eyebrow hairs that like to grow in random locations. Like, seriously, right above my eyelids? What are you smoking, eyebrows -_-? Otherwise, I’ll leave it as is.

☆彡 Since I’m on the topic of beauty, I would really like to learn makeup one day. No time soon, but in the future. If I am going to attempt makeup then it has to be subtle. No neon green eye shadow with purple lipstick and bright red blush. I…I can’t do things like that. It has to look as natural as possible. The only thing I’ll use generously is maybe mascara and eyeliner. Even then it won’t be like…raccoon generous. Just enough to know it’s there. Once more, in the future. Far future. When I am confident with doing things like that. Right now, though, I have to focus on one thing at a time. Beauty will get my time when I’m ready.

☆彡 I keep thinking about how great it will be to finally attend art school. It’ll be expensive, yes, but leaving art school with the ability to do things like 3D renditions, animation, and character design…it’s really exciting! It’s one of those things that will help me career wise, and hobby wise. I guess the only thing to do now is wait. Have patience. See how things turn out. Then, once it all begins, put my best effort and do not slack off. Not even for a second. I’m sure that if I keep this mentality from start to finish I will graduate with impressive skills. Maybe impressive enough to work for big companies like Blizzard, Bioware, Square-Enix, Nintendo, Gearbox, LucasArts and Bungie. Who knows? I may be able to branch off into movie, cartoon, and comic books. An artist is an artist is an artist. Well, I’m not going to wait around until I graduate to make an impression. I’m going to draw everyday — all day — until my fingers fall off. Then I have to reattach them, of course, because I need them. But in the end I’ll be better! *pose*

Okay. That’s it. I’m going to go to bed. Not even remotely tired but…I’ll attempt to straighten this sleep schedule of mine out the best I can.

Previous Post
Leave a comment

Comment

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: